


All I've Wanted

by holls



Series: Decisions [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Hand Jobs, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Porn with Feelings, True Love, Vibrators
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-08 03:12:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18886009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holls/pseuds/holls
Summary: Steve makes a decision for him and Bucky's future.





	All I've Wanted

Bucky wasn’t sure where Steve had disappeared to so early in the morning, but he was sure he would have let him know if it was important. Ever since their mutual confession, they’d been closer than before, even if it just meant Bucky curling up against him as they watched television. It was what Bucky had craved for so long, though he had to admit it hurt his heart every time he looked at Steve and realized how old he was. Their time together wasn’t going to last forever, not by a long shot, but Bucky wasn’t going to shed any tears about it, not in front of Steve at least. He had all the time he wanted to cry alone after Steve passed, and before he would after him, he was still determined to stick to that plan. Steve hadn’t managed to talk him out of it yet. 

Pulling the sheets off their shared bed, Bucky balled it up and tossed it in the hamper along with the pillow cases. He’d been in a cleaning mood, figuring he might as well get some shit done while he felt like doing it. Plus doing it alone now meant that Steve wouldn’t insist on helping later, he’d probably be tired by the time he got back from wherever he went. Bucky had tried texting, but he knew Steve often forgot to turn the ringer on, so getting a hold of him was rarely easy. It also meant that Bucky was going to worry more not knowing if he was okay. 

A wave of relief washed over Bucky as he heard the sound of the front door and the jingle of Steve’s keys being placed on the counter. He wanted to rush out and ask him where he’d been, but he didn’t want to come off as insanely overprotective, that and he hadn’t finished making the bed. Though he’d once honed that skill in the military, he wasn’t quite as good at it now, especially when it came to the fitted sheet. Steve always teased him for the rumpled state he left them in when he tried to fold them, and now as he wrestled to get it on the bed, he was sure Steve would laugh at that too. 

“Fucking piece of…you bastard thing!” Bucky cursed as the sheet covering one of the corners sprung out from underneath, curling on the bed. Getting it in position where he was working on it now, he walked back over to the far corner to take the sheet, give it a tug, and try to get it over the mattress. Satisfied when all four corners were covered, Bucky put his hands on his hips, blowing a stray piece of hair out of his face when he heard a knock on the door behind him. “Steve, I’m just making the bed, why are y-?” 

Turning around, Bucky’s jaw hit the floor alongside his heart as he stared at the man that was standing in front of him. It was Steve, but not the old man he’d been living with the past few months, but his Steve. Young, strong, vibrant Steve, holding a bouquet of flowers with a look on his face that begged for approval for what he had done. 

“I had to,” was all Steve said, having forgotten the beautiful speech he’d been writing in his head for a while now, ever since he’d decided on his course of action. “I had to be with you.” 

Bucky didn’t move, he could only stare, his mouth dry as he opened it to speak. The only thing that he could do was shed a few tears as he thought about what Steve had just done, just so he could be with him. He wasn’t going to insult his efforts and tell him he shouldn’t have done it, because he should have, damn it, this was his Steve and he didn’t belong with anyone else. 

“You look a bit better, I guess,” Bucky said, a slow smile spreading across his face. “Get a haircut?” 

“Something like that,” Steve laughed back, their eyes locked on each other. “I’d say I wanted to be the hot one of the two of us, but I don’t think I could do anything to take that title off you.” 

“Steve…” Bucky started, letting out a laugh, but it was more tears than anything. “Stevie, what did you do?” 

“I did what I had to, what I wanted to do all this time,” Steve set down the flowers on the dresser, walking over to Bucky and cupping his face in his hands, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “I need you, Bucky, I don’t want to leave you. I want to hold you, and kiss you, and make love to you, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.” 

Bucky wanted to reply, biting hard on his bottom lip to keep it from trembling so hard as he reached for Steve with shaking hands. There were a million things he wanted to say, but he couldn’t bring himself to say a word. All he wanted was Steve right now. 

“Buck, it’s okay…” Stepping forward, Steve took both of Bucky’s hands, squeezing them in his own, before pulling him into a proper bone crushing hug. “It’s okay, I’m here…” 

“Please don’t let me go…” Bucky pleaded in a whisper, burying his face against Steve’s shoulder, tears slipping from his eyes. “Don’t ever let me go again, let’s just be like this.” 

“I’m not going to let you go, I swear to you,” Steve said, rubbing Bucky’s back, turning his head to kiss his temple softly. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

“I feel like this can’t be real…” Bucky said softy, though as much doubt as he had in his mind, he could almost feel the long standing wounds on his heart knitting together. “I feel like I died and you’re here to come get me.”

“No, not yet, that’s a while’s off, Buck,” Steve said, letting go of him just enough to look into his eyes again. “Now that I’ve aged once, I know now that I want to grow old with you, I want us to be old men together looking after each other. I want to hold your hand and talk about all the time we had together and how we’d do it all the same if we could do it again. I want to live a long life with you without regret.” 

“Holy shit…” Bucky laughed weakly, touching Steve’s cheek with his still shaking hand. “You really thought this through.” 

“I made my decision the night you told me you loved me, everything since then has been waiting, and wanting,” Steve leaned his head against Bucky’s touch, turning his face to press a kiss against his palm. “I’ve been waiting for you for so long, these last few weeks have been hell though, being so close, having to keep this from you...” 

“Steve-“ Bucky began, rubbing their noses together. “Oh my god, Steve…” 

“Do you remember what I called you that night? My Bucky. My beautiful, blue-eyed, loving Bucky,” Steve said with a weak laugh of his own, trying to keep his emotions in check and failing miserably. “I’m going to call you that every night for the rest of our lives.” 

“Every night…” Bucky clung to him tighter, trying to convince himself that this was real and not the best dream he’d ever had. 

“I mean it, I’m not going to let you go, Bucky,” Steve said, his hands moving down to where Bucky’s shirt ended, slipping under the material as he rubbed his bare skin. “Can I take it off?”

Bucky nodded, not doing much to help Steve take his shirt off, watching as he dropped it to the floor. When his boyfriend came closer, his own hands reached out to repay the favour, peeling off Steve’s shirt and seeing his perfect physique again. “And I was just starting to find your old body hot.”

“Well I’ll get to it again, but you’re not going to look much better than me at that point,” Steve said with a laugh, looking at Bucky as he bit his lip. “I’m not always the best at reading signals, you’re going to have to help me out. Do you want this moment to be romantic, or...?”

“Steve, I want you...as in Steve Rogers, I have been waiting all my life for this, and if you make me wait another second, I am going to hurt someone,” Bucky said insistently, hesitating for a second before he grabbed Steve by either side of his face, pressing their lips together in a desperate kiss.

Surprised, and feeling incredibly lucky, Steve slowly began to walk forwards, backing Bucky towards the bed until his knees hit it and spilled them both onto the mattress. Pinning Bucky down, Steve took both of Bucky’s wrists in one hand, holding them over his head as his mouth ravaged his boyfriend’s. His other hand snaking down Bucky’s bare belly, Steve slipped Bucky’s sweatpants down his hip, trying to get them to go lower. 

“You’re fucking eager...” Bucky breathed, watching as Steve pushed his pants down and off his legs. “I’m not complaining.” 

“Of course I’m eager, look at you, you’re MINE,” Steve awkwardly shoved off his own jeans, kicking them off his foot as he climbed back on top of Bucky. “So where were we?” 

“Somewhere around here,” Bucky purred, kissing him hungrily as he wrapped his legs loosely around Steve’s, moving them just to feel the sensation of their leg hair rubbing together. It was those little things reminding Bucky how real this was, along with the bite of Steve’s teeth as their kiss got more heated. He wasn’t sure if he could really taste blood or not, but he wasn’t slowing down.

“Bucky, I fucking want you more than air...” Steve panted when their lips finally parted, still tasting him. “What do you want, baby? What would make you happy?” 

“What would you say if I said your cock up my ass?” Bucky asked as casually as he could manage, trying not to laugh when Steve’s face went bright red. “I mean, you wanted direct, right?”

“Oh I’m not...not going to complain, I just...I don’t think I ever got hard so fast,” Steve laughed, scratching the back of his neck. “I guess that’s another title I’ll give you...”

“What other titles do you have in mind?” Bucky asked, his curiosity piqued. 

“Hottest Man Alive, to start, followed by Best Egg Cook, Greatest Movie Picker....” Steve said, the corners of his mouth playing up a little. “...Husband?” 

“...are you asking me or telling me?” Bucky asked after a shocked few seconds. 

“I’m asking you, and I wish that was more romantic, but...we both know each other more than anyone else, I don’t think we have any secrets from each other now, and...goddamnit, Bucky, I’ve never been closer to anyone than you. Anyone,” Steve said, looking down at Bucky, petting his hair. “I wish I asked you ages ago, even if it wasn’t legal back then, there was nothing I wanted more than to make you my husband.”

“And there’s nothing I would have wanted more than to say yes. Definitely yes, yes yes yes,” Bucky grinned, leaning up to steal a quick kiss. “But...Steve?” 

“Yes, my soon to be husband?” Steve whispered against his lips. 

“When I said that I wanted your cock in my ass, I thought I couldn’t possibly be hornier, or clearer, but now, with this on the table...” Bucky grinned, his eyes twinkling. “If you don’t fuck me right now, I’m going to break, because I’ve waited for a long time and if this moment gets more perfect, I won’t be able to handle it. I’ll just fucking cry or something.”

“And here I thought it wouldn’t be good enough for you. Damn it, Bucky, what do you mean you waited? You didn’t...” Steve said, smiling nervously, wondering if he was interpreting that wrong. 

“You’ll be my first,” Bucky said, his cheeks red. “That’s...that’s okay right?” 

Steve didn’t reply, his lips just met Bucky’s again, pinning him down by his wrists again as he pressed his body against Bucky’s, feeling his fiancé’s heart pounding in his chest. Lowering his free hand down, his fingers encircled both of their cocks, stroking slowly as his thumb rubbed across the tips, blending their sticky pre-cum. He’d seen Bucky’s cock before, it wasn’t anything new to him that way, but it was the first time he’d gotten his hands on it, and he was studying every ridge and vein.

“Holy shit, you’re good at that...” Bucky panted, licking his lips, his fingernails biting into his palm. 

“I’ve thought about it a lot. I’m way better read than I am experienced with this,” Steve said, looking down at him. “We...oh shit, we need lube for this.” 

“I have some, I do that a lot,” Bucky said, figuring there was no real reason to be embarrassed about it at this point. “Under the sink in the bathroom.”

“Do you? What do you think about?” Steve asked teasingly, stroking him faster. 

“You, you idiot,” Bucky scoffed before letting out a moan. “I didn’t think about this, I should have...” 

“Don’t go anywhere, okay? Keep your eyes on the ceiling and your hands above your head, don’t move,” Steve said, getting up to head into the small bathroom, opening the cupboard and picking up the poorly hidden tube of lube next to a knocked over vibrator. Grinning, he reached down to pick it up, turning it on to make sure it was working before walking back into the bedroom. 

“I didn’t move,” Bucky pointed out when he could hear Steve’s footsteps coming back into the room. “Did you find it?” 

“I found it. Found something else too,” Steve said as he walked in, setting the vibrator and lube on the bed beside Bucky’s hip, and moving up the bed to look him in the eye. “…I have an idea of what to do here, but I’m no expert. Will you be patient with me?” 

“I’ll be honest with you, and i’ll be very patient,” Bucky vowed, smiling back at Steve. “Use lots of lube, take your time, and I’ll be fine.”

“That’s what I was hoping for,” Steve said, reaching down to pick up the lube, popping the cap open with one hand as he tugged Bucky’s thigh to part his legs further. “Tell me if you want me to stop.”

“I promise…” Bucky said, holding his breath for a moment as Steve’s fingers brushed up against his entrance, remembering that he’d have to relax if this was going to happen. Slowly exhaling, he struggled to keep himself from tensing up again as Steve pushed a digit inside of him, a little to begin before it moved in further. 

“Are you doing okay, Buck?” Steve asked, moving his finger in and out, studying the expression on Bucky’s face as he did so, the corner of his mouth tugging into a smile at his fiancé’s obvious pleasure. 

“Good, really good…” Bucky closed his eyes for a moment, wanting to keep them on Steve. This was his ultimate fantasy come to life, there was no way he was going to miss out on any of it. 

“Excellent, because I have a bit of an idea…” Steve added another finger, twisting them inside Bucky, hooking them a little to stroke the soft walls. “I’m hoping it works out the way I want because, well, it would be hot.”

“Should I be nervous?” Bucky asked, looking over at Steve, letting out a shaky breath. 

“Hopefully not, but you need to close your eyes and bend your knees so I have better access to you,” Steve said, watching as Bucky got into position, picking up the vibrator to coat it liberally with lube. Pushing it against Bucky’s puckered hole, Steve turned it on as he guided it inside, grinning as Bucky gasped and grabbed onto the bed. “Like that?” 

“Jesus, Steve!” Bucky panted, trembling all over as Steve worked the vibrator in and out of him, twisting two handfuls of blankets in his hands. “Steve, not fair…” 

“Lots of things haven’t been fair for us, Bucky, but that doesn’t mean we stop,” Steve teased, shifting positions so he could lie on his side and watch Bucky’s face as he fucked him with the vibrating wand. “So when you used this on yourself, were you thinking about me?”

“Of course I was. I know you can’t make your cock vibrate, but it was an added bonus,” Bucky said, his breath quickening as he fought to keep from squishing Steve’s hand between his thighs. 

“How often did you think about me?” Steve purred, his voice soft and calming as he looked into Bucky’s eyes. 

“Every fucking day…” Bucky laughed, though it quickly turned into a moan. “If you’re trying to make me cum right now, you’re doing a great job.” 

“No, not yet…” Steve pulled the vibrator out of Bucky, turning it off, and tossing it aside, reaching for the lube again. “I want my cock to be the one to make you cum. I want to feel you squeeze down on me when you do. And I want to cum in you so fucking bad, Bucky, I’ve been waiting for this for years.” 

“What are you waiting for now?” Bucky asked, his voice sweet, but his eyes betraying that innocence. 

Steve couldn’t wipe the grin off his face as he got up, moving between Bucky’s parted thighs as he stared back down into his lover’s face. Opening the lube again, he coated his fingers again to push them inside Bucky, making sure he was thoroughly slick before he turned his attention to his own stiff member. Once he was convinced he was suitably prepared, Steve put his hands on the back of Bucky’s thighs, pushing his knees against his chest, before carefully lining up the swollen head of his cock against the tight pucker.

“I love you so much,” Bucky said as he looked up at Steve, smiling widely as he felt tears rise in his eyes. 

“And I love you too,” Steve smiled back, slowly pushing inside him as he let out a low moan. He’d been expecting Bucky to be tight from having his fingers in him, but the warm sensation of him gripping his cock was enough to take his breath away. “Holy shit, Bucky, you’re so fucking tight.” 

“You just love my virgin ass, don’t you?” Bucky reached for Steve as he leaned over him and carefully began to thrust, grabbing onto his arms with both hands. “I’m all yours, Stevie, no one else but you…” 

“Fuck…” Steve lost his rhythm for a moment with that statement, his fingers grasping Bucky’s thighs tighter as he tried to regain himself. It was a losing battle, though, all he was thinking about now was fucking Bucky for the first time, and it added fuel to the fire. 

“Steve…Steve, oh god…” Bucky whimpered, his voice getting steadily louder as Steve went faster, the perfect curve of Steve’s dick rubbing up against his prostate in a way that felt like fate. They were made for each other, they were a perfect fit, and it also meant that he wasn’t going to be able to last long. 

“You’re so good, Buck, you feel like heaven,” Steve swallowed hard, trying to do everything he could to slow down how fast his orgasm was rushing in, wanting to pull back just as much as he wanted to keep going. “Nothing’s come close to this, nothing…” 

“Steve, I can’t…” Bucky was trembling hard now, his entire body down to his toes going stiff as he held back, but as he could feel the surge bearing down on him, the wall he’d erected to hold it back was crumbling. In a burst, Bucky felt like he was blind, every sense in his body lost in the frantic, broken scream he let forth as he came hard enough to splash on his chest. 

“Jesus, Buck!” It was Steve’s turn to cry out now as Bucky clamped down around him, pushing his hips as tight as he could against him, climaxing deep within him. Jolting as his ultra sensitive cock slipped from Bucky’s too tight ass, feeling like every nerve within it was electrified. Collapsing on the bed beside him, Steve could only pant deeply, feeling like he’d just run a marathon in a second. 

“…Steve?” Bucky said after a few seconds had passed, his heart finally starting too slow in his chest. 

“Yeah, Buck?” Steve asked, turning his head to look at him. 

“Did you mean it when you said you wanted me to be your husband?” Bucky turned his head, looking into Steve’s eyes, a love drunk smile on his face. 

“I’m here, like this, aren’t I? My second chance at the life I always wanted. With you,” Steve reached over, taking Bucky’s flesh hand in his own, lacing their fingers together. “I’d say I’d go out and get you a ring right now but…I don’t think I can walk, and I want to do that again the second I can.” 

Bucky laughed at that, shaking his head. “Rings tomorrow, okay? Right before we drive to city hall and exchange them, because I’ve already spent enough of my life not being your husband.” 

“That sounds good to me,” Steve smiled, bringing Bucky’s hand up to his mouth to press a kiss to his knuckles, absolutely lost in his sea blue eyes. “It’s a date.”


End file.
